I have been packing for so many months, but no I really got to get myself to work because there is so much packing to do in seven days that it’s just insane. So much to do, so little time.
Lately I have been running around like a moron for the past few weeks collecting and gathering stuff that I will probably need for the next few months. it has been such a long time, for these past few months I have only thought about myself and it felt so good, I didn’t care where you were, what you were doing or who you were with. I didn’t count down the days since I last saw you, or how you smiled when I would say something really stupid I didn’t care, until last night.
It took me a really long time to fall asleep, I listen to my ipod so loud to block my thoughts out. I guess those four hours in bed had to make up for the last six months. I missed new years eve, your birthday and a couple of months ago when on a Sunday night you were at the exact same bar. I am so glad I missed you, because I wouldn’t have at least tried to move on from you if you were still apart of my life.
Things are really hard, I know. and one day, I hope you know too.
My book is crazy and it is doing wonderful. I am going to miss the late night writing while I am away, but I have an empty book and a pen to keep me company and creative on long flights far away.
just wanted you to know. i miss you. very much but i miss her, even more.
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